Well, things do not seem to be getting any better for Jack as his day goes on. Are any of us surprised? This episode started with Jack on the hunt for the real assassin, because he and Chloe watch the show and know that it's never the first person accused (in this case, the Iranian president's mistress, Meredith Reed). Jack follows a lead to what looks like one of the outer boroughs and finds out where the Russian has gone by buying a new pair of kicks for a nice boy on the basketball court. When he goes in the house the Russian was seen entering, he find two dead people. Oh Jack, how do you get yourself in these silly situations? Aaaand cue New York's finest!! One of them seems willing to hear out Jack's "I'm from CTU and these guys were killed by an assassin" story. The other - well, not so much. He would rather tie Jack up in the basement and beat on him for awhile.
Meanwhile... back at CTU: The Nightclub. Arlo is so close to cracking the encrypted file on Meredith's computer. Chloe knows it will be nothing useful, because, again, this isn't her first rodeo. Chloe also notices that Dana seems to be having some drama. Turns out her ex, Kevin (heehee), is a bit of a psychopath. He's also really gross. What the hell was with the "say my name" bit?? Much to my dismay, instead of kicking his ass, Dana gave him a key to her apartment for "just tonight". Ummmm.... Dana? That's not going to work out!! I'd really love to know what she is hiding because right now it looks like her only mistake is having really bad taste in guys when she was younger. I'm hoping there is more because otherwise this entire storyline is useless.
Over in the interrogation room, after a lot of annoying questions from Hastings, the idiot head of CTU, Meredith finally gives up that she and Omar, the Iranian Pres, are doing the nasty. He doesn't believe her, because why would Omar want a white girl?? He gets hold of Omar, who despite his brother's urgings, confirms Meredith's story. (Way to man up, Omar!) This really upsets little bro, who we know is behind the whole assassination plot. BUT, Hastings doesn't think that this means she ISN'T the assassin (because she really seems the cold ruthless killer type), so when Arlo discovers the encrypted file is plans to bomb the UN he has the building evacuated.
Cut back to Jack. He's still tied up, but cliche NYPD guy doesn't realize that Jack spent a lot of time in a Chinese Prison being tortured, so this stuff is a walk in the park. Jack goes all badass and attacks the guy and breaks the chair he's tied to on a wall. Good cop comes in, calls in the situation and finds out that yes, this is all part of a plot to assassinate Omar, just like Jack said. Duh. Just in time, Jack gets hold of Cole who stops the president from getting blown up, and gets a manly cut on his ear. So we take him more seriously as a badass CTU agent.
This is where things get REALLY fun. Cole spots the assassin and follows him in to a building. But assassin surprises him from behind with a gun (Ruh-roh Scoobie. Get it? Cuz he's Fred. Whatever. Shut up.) and tells him to call in that the area is clear, but when Cole instead says the assassin is with him, Jack magically shows up and shoots assassin dead before he can shoot Cole. (Told you he was bottom of the evil ladder) Cue Cole needing a new pair of pants.
Meanwhile, the brother finds out Omar is fine and goes BAT SHIT CRAZY! He runs out on Omar's wife and daughter and then stabs his CTU escort in the neck with a pen! Way to keep it together Jason Schwartzman wannabe! Guess who was sad to hear this.... poor Omar. First he has to dump his mistress to keep peace talks from going into the crapper and then it turns out his bro is trying to get him killed. Omar is a good man - he will not make it through the season. He's the President Palmer of Iran!
Back at CTU they are examining the tattoos that were all over our Russian assassin. I guess he is part of some Russian mob and this is all about a plan for the Russians to bomb us because it turns out, along with tattoos, he is also covered in residue from Uranium. Awesome! Is this the Red Dawn remake I've been hearing so much about?? Guess what? It turns out a familiar face was deep undercover with this Russian mob ---- Renee! (Cue my husband paying more attention to the show!) Speaking . So now instead of leaving to go meet Kim in LA, Jack needs to go along with Renee undercover as part of some suicide watch program. Oh Renee....
(PS Remember how I said Dana giving her key to Kevin was a bad idea? It was. He is also Bat Shit Crazy!! Seriously - kill him and lets move on! Four hours in and I'm already sick of this storyline)
Brother (I'll get his name eventually) is at a fancy restaurant with an old Russian guy, and his two sons. One son is Sark from Alias (WOOT!) and the other is dying in the kitchen pantry from radiation poisoning (aka proof the Uranium exists). I'm pretty sure this is some sort of health code violation. They conspire to sell things to blow other things up. Bad stuff. Where's Jack?
Oh, that's where Jack is - in my favorite scene ever on 24. I like to call it "Hello Dr. Frankenstein. I'd like you to meet your monster." It turns out when Jack forced Renee into torturing people last season it flicked some crazy switch in her head causing her to think it was a good idea to SAW A GUYS HAND OFF!!!!! When Jack thinks you've gone too far..... well, let's just say you are beyond going too far!
And that's where we left it. Jack's got a one way ticket to crazy town on the Renee express. I am excited to see where it goes. Jack is never the voice of reason.
Sorry for the somewhat crap blog this time. Massive headaches equals very little creativity! Better next time when I only have an hour of show to sort through!
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