Ummmm.... wow. So how about that ending? Best ever? I say yes. But I suppose we should take the time to go through what happened in the 55 minutes before we got to that crazy last few minutes first.
This week lets start with everyone favorite Bar owner, Sam Merlotte. Poor Sam is quickly discovering just how much of a problem little brother Tommy is going to be. First he gets a call from a not so happy Terry and Arlene (she's pregnant and needs sleep, you know!) saying that there are some loud "sex noises" coming from Tommy's rental. When Sam goes over he finds a naked Tommy and some chic being very obnoxious. Oh Sam.... think my friend! Look at who Tommy grew up with! What did you expect? Later Tommy and Arlene clash again over Tommy possibly (definitely) stealing Arlene's tip and Sam takes Arlene's side, much to Tommy's dismay. All of this leads to Sam, well, having some sort of psychotic break when Calvin Norris comes into the bar (we'll get to why he is there is a minute, of course). Not happy with Calvin's attitude towards his daughter, Crystal, Sam takes it upon himself to literally beat his face in, much to the shock of a very crowded Merlotte's. Ruh Roh.
Speaking of Crystal, let's talk about her and Jason next. Crystal is still waiting at Jason's house for him to return from Hotshot. When Jason comes in he finds Crystal's fiance (I can never remember his name). Crystal has told him that Jason kidnapped her. And raped her. Rape isn't funny, but Jason's face when she said that was. Together they knock out the fiance and then tie him up to a tree and call 911 to report it anonymously (and mention that he had a bag of V in his pocket). But the next morning when Jason and Crystal show up at the police station, Rose (the receptionist) is hysterical crying because deputy Kevin got beat nearly to death last night when answering the call that Jason made. Rose also apparently felt Kevin was the only man she ever loved. Great reaction from Andy and Jason to that! Jason suggests that they use this to take down Hotshot, a plan Andy is surprised came from Jason. However, when Jason tells Crystal about it, she is not as excited. In fact she is downright mad/scared, as they are her "kin" and many of them do not deserve to be hurt. Cue Calvin and the beat down I just described. Afterwards she goes with Lafayette and Jesus to take Calvin to the hospital despite Jason's protests. As for what happens to Jason after that.... let's talk about Tara first.
Miss Tara is having a rough time of it. As we saw last week, she is starting to break down after her troubling few days with Franklin Mott. Now she is trying to recover. After talking to Sam about what happened with Franklin, he suggested she talked to someone about it. While Tara refuses to see a shrink (can you imagine??!) she did go to a support group for rape victims. In that group: newest waitress at Merlotte's, Holly. Holly describes her attack and talks about the benefit of having this support group and how it can help her live her life instead of hiding from it. Tara is obviously aware these are important words to here, but this is Tara, and it may take some time to sink it. Later at Merlottes she does have a bit of a breakthrough when she genuinely wishes Lafayette well with Jesus. But her real breakthrough comes outside... when Franklin Mott attacks. The psycho is mad not because she tried to kill him, but because she didn't seem to mourn him when she thought he was dead. Tara tells him he is a psychopath (um, duh) and that she hopes he kills her just so she can be done dealing with him. But before he can take care of that for her, Jason shows up shotgun in hand. Franklin basically laughs him off because what is a shotgun going to do to a Vampire? But you, me and Jason know a hell of a lot - if that shotgun is loaded with Fellowship of the Sun provided wooden bullets. Bye Bye, Franklin.
I just mentioned Holly, so I'll talk about her other scene with Arlene too before going on. Arlene finally says outloud what we all know - that Renee is the father of her baby. What we also learned is that Arlene feels that mean the baby is evil, and she doesn't want it. While Holly said she would go with her to the clinic, Arlene didn't seem to think that was an option. So... kind of stuck. I'm interested to see where this goes. Arlene is a pain, and I HATE her in the books, but I enjoy the character in the show, so I'm hoping something works out for her.
Lafayette seems to be in the best place we have ever seen him. His mom is not hating him, even admitting that maybe God does love gays (!). Things with Jesus are also great. They have a lovely night together while mom sleeps it off. Then the next night Jesus came to Merlotte's and ordered a veggie burger with bacon, just to see if Lafayette would make it. (Best line of the night until the end of the show!) Lafayette is smitten with Jesus, and who wouldn't be - Kevin Alejandro is adorable. I must say I'm getting whiplash from all of his recent roles tho. First a not always nice former boyfriend of Hilda on Ugly Betty, then a detective on Southland, now a gay nurse on TB, and in the fall, a warehouse worker that has a relationship with Lauren Graham on Parenthood. I know there is something going on with his character, and possibly Lafayette too, whether or not Lafayette knows it. I can't wait to see where it goes.
Merlotte's was busy last night - because in addition to everything else I've just mentioned there was also some development on the Hoyt/Jessica front. Hoyt and his very short girlfriend, Summer, came and Jessica was not pleased. And it showed, via her fangs popping out. Poor Jess. When Summer needed a break from talking about herself and how much better a match she was for Hoyt than Jessica, she excused herself to go to the restroom. Jessica came over and she and Hoyt had an adorable talk about how Hoyt hates Summer, but she is better than wallowing in how miserable he is without Jess. Jess started to cry and Tommy gave Hoyt a hard time about being mean to Jessica. I have a feeling this break-up isn't going to last much longer. Who can resist Hoyt??
Back at that other bar, Fangtasia, Nan Flanigan comes to question Eric about the whole Russell Edgington/The Magister thing. Her crazy army (seriously, what was with those outfits?) set up some webcams so that "The Authority" can be part of this questioning. Eric gives them the whole run down of what happened, including his 1000 year old grudge against Russell. Nan and The Authority aren't sure what to do, so they take a day or two to think about it, putting Eric and Pam on lockdown in Fangtasia. Eric, assuming he is about to reach his final death, says his goodbyes to Pam, saying that she should be a maker if he dies. However, when Nan returns, she says that this whole thing is such a mess, and that AVL and The Authority are going to pretend it never happened, and if he happens to get revenge and kill Russell, well, that never happened either. Woo! Of course, a not so happy Russell (and the incredibly gross remains of Talbot in a crystal urn) sees Nan at Fangtasia and assumes they are protecting Eric. He vows revenge... which he gets. But let's deal with Bill/Sookie first.
After their night of crazy sex and then shower sex, Bill and Sookie go ahead and clean up the dead body from her living room. Something that has become a regular occurrence for them during their relationship, which brings back up all of the issues these two were having. Bill points out it is better than being boring, but Sookie wouldn't mind some boring every once and awhile. And there is the whole "you kept a file on me" issue. Bill says it was to discover why Eric was so interested in her, to which I said "LIAR!" They leave it sort of up in the air when it come time for Bill to go to sleep and Sookie to deal with her day. For Sookie that meant meeting Hadley and her son (we are rushing the books a bit, aren't we??) at the Aquarium. Hadley is shaky at best, and afraid that the vamps are going to come after her. But we discover the real reason she wanted to see Sookie was not to warn Sookie but to see if her son was also "special" aka a telepath. Turns out - he is. And that leads Hadley to run off with her boy in tow and scared to death. Bill meanwhile starts to have a leak in his sleeping area - when he opens the hatch, he finds out he is the mysterious land that Sookie was in during her coma. Claudine finds him there, realizes he is only there because he had so much of Sook's blood, and assumes he killed her. Bill says he didn't and when he approaches Claudine becomes almost entranced with her and tries to bite her. He demands she tells him when Sookie is because Sookie needs to know to protect herself. Back at Sookie's house that night Bill says he knows why everyone is so interested in her - and it's because..... (be patient. We'll find out soon)
And then there is the final scene. Nan Flanigan is in the limo heading to the airport to fly to Portland, Oregon! (I'll meet you there!) She gets hungry, but it turns out even Nan isn't drinking that True Blood crap, she has a half naked girl there to drink from. Convient. On the TV is a CNN-type channel, where the anchor discusses protests about the VRA outside the capitol in Salem, OR (I wonder if my mom was there). There is a noise in the studio hinting something may be about to happen. And boy howdy, does something happen. That something? Russell appearing behind the anchor and literally ripping out his spine. Awesome. Russell gives a stirring speech about how the AVL is lying to the American people - the Vamps are scary scary folks that the humans she very much fear. And that Vamps don't want equal rights because they are in no way equal to people - they are very much superior. So be afraid, be very afraid. And then the best closing line/delivery ever, "Now, time for the weather. Tiffany?" Hey Emmys - shine up a gold statue for Denis O'Hare for next year, would ya? Thanks!
So..... what did you think? Did you all love this ep as much as I did? Are you happy with the way Alan is taking this season? Did everyone else hope Alcide would show up at some point? I miss you Joe Manganiello!
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