LOST: LAX (Spoilers! Beware!)

A brief disclaimer before starting my first LOST blog.  I do not claim to be a LOST expert.  I am just as clueless as the rest of you.  I have no answers.  LOST makes me feel dumb.

I also want to give a little background to my love of LOST.  I think JJ Abrams is a genius, and when I saw he had a new show premiering in 2004, I was all over it.  I knew it would be great.  I'm so happy to have watched from the beginning and experienced the show as its aired.  It is probably the most frustrating and exhilerating TV experience ever, and I feel a little sorry for those who don't get it.  Not watching LOST means you are not really understanding what TV can be.  Losties understand me, don't you? It also introduced us to a parade of talent behind the scenes (Damon, Carlton, Alex Kurtzman, Robert Orci, Bryan Bryan Burk, Jack Bender, Michael Giacchino and so many more) and on screen (All the ladies thank you, LOST creators, for bringing us Josh Holloway.  And the men thank you for Evangeline Lilly, who before this was only know for her "call me if you are lonely" 1-800 commericals).   But enough about how awesome the show is in general, let's get to the ridiculousness that went down last night.

First we had to watch Juliet hit the bomb again.  Chills!  And we had to endure what felt like the LONGEST white screen ever!  They made us wait 9 months, but that 10 seconds of white felt like a friggin eternity! To make it easier, I'm going to break down the general plot lines into three sections:  The 2004 Reality (AKA Flight 815 lands safe) and the 2007 reality at the temple and the 2007 reality at the beach.

2004 Reality:
This is where that Evil Team Darlton brought us first.  With Jack's eye opening again, but this time, on flight 815.  He talks to Rose (Bernard's in the restroom) and there is turbulence --- here we go again! Or not! It's all good.  Bernard comes and sits back down and Greg Grunberg (the pilot) tells us to keep our seatbelts fastened (literally and figuratively, I think).  One by one we see who is on the plane: Kate is still under arrest, however if you follow all the viral videos released at Comic Con this year, you know it is not for killing her stepdad, but for killing some other random (at least for now) guy.  Hurley still won the lottery, but has endless good luck instead of bad. Boone went to get Shannon, but she is too busy with a film career to show up for the flight (or she wants to stay with her boyfriend. whatever).  Sawyer is still hot.  Locke is still paralyzed.  Charlie almost dies, and in what I think is one of the more profound moments of the show tells Jack (who saved him, natch) "I should have died."  Yeah, Charlie.  We know. And I'm sure we will get to it again.  I'm still crying about "Not Pennys Boat". Jin and Sun are still not happy together, and Jin is back to his old over-bearing behaviors. Doc Arzt is still ridiculous!  Claire is still really pregnant! Desmond is there! Or is he??  How do you lose someone on a plane, Jack? What's equally important is who we didn't see: Michael/Walt, Libby, Ana Lucia.  I think the fact we didn't see them on the flight isn't just because they weren't available, or that Malcolm David Kelly doesn't look 10 anymore. Setting off the bomb did more than just reset the flight - it reset their lives.  And that of the island as well, because it appears to be the new Atlantis.
When the flight lands and they all disembark, I got chills.  Is that what really should have happened?  Things don't get much easier for everyone - Oceanic lost Jack's dad (which led to a bunch of "late for his own funeral" jokes.  at least in my head it did), Kate is on the run (and is holding Claire's cab driver at gun point), Jin was trying to smuggle money and I'm not sure if Sun can speak English in this reality or not. Charlie is under arrest. My biggest question - do they rememeber??  They never acknowledge anything, but they all give each other "looks."  Maybe it's just a "Hey, I'm pretty and you are pretty! Let's look at each other longer than necessary" kinda look.  I don't know.

Moving on...

2007 Reality - The Swan/The Temple:
Meanwhile - 3 years later on the island, our survivors show up again, thinking Jack/Daniel's (haha, Jack Daniels.  sigh) plan didn't work, or at least not exactly.  They soon realize they are at the hatch and back in at least their own time period. Juliet isn't dead yet, so poor Sawyer has to say goodbye. Again. In what is possibly the greatest meatphor for the show, her final words were, "I have to tell you something. It's really really important....." And then she dies!  WHAT?!  Don't worry, we get our answer to that question in a minute.  (***ADDED THEORY*** I read this and had to come back and add it in.  So, when Juliet is dying she says something to Sawyer about meeting him for a cup of coffee, and he has no idea what she is talking about.  Then she gets this face of recoginition, and looks at him a little sad, and then is kinda happy and says her "I have to tell you something" bit.  I read a theory, from Ms. Elizabeth Mitchell herself via E!'s Watch with Kristin: Juliet was jumping back and forth between the 2004 and 2007 realities.  So in 2004 she was meeting Sawyer for a cup of coffee-- and we know what Eddie Izzard says about a cup of coffee--  and that is how she knew it worked. So.... mull over that one for a bit.  Anyway....) Sawyer is royally pissed at Jack for killing his lady friend, though really, didn't DANIEL come up with the crazy idea in the first place? But poor Daniel is dead at his momma's hand, so.... Sayid is dying from a gunshot wound (Ben's dad shot him when they were escaping the Dharma compound in 1977).   While everyone is helping Juliet, Hurley sees dead Jacob who tells him to bring Sayid and the guitar case to The Temple to save him, but I'm thinking he just wants Sayid's sexy body.  And by wants, I mean wants to use it as is own.  You follow?  (It's Lost, so I get it if you don't) So Hurley gets Jin, Jack and Kate to take him to the temple while Miles and Sawyer stay back to bury Juliet.  Turns out Sawyer wants Miles to stay because he wanted Miles to "talk" to Juliet and find out what that really really important thing was.  And it was..... "It worked."  (Yeah, Jules.  We know!) Hurley, Jin, Kate, Jack and Sayid get to the temple where crazy Cindy the Oceanic Flight attendant and the Flight 815 kids have been hanging for a few years with an Asian guy who hates speaking English.  (Why did it take everyone so long to realize that guy wasn't translating back to English??) Their ticket to not getting shot is a large wooden ankh that was in the guitar case.  Asian guy breaks it open and there is a piece of paper.  Apparently these guys are bouncers, and Jacob wanted to make sure they knew the Losties are on the list! So they go inside and to help save him, the temple dudes drown Sayid, in what I can only assume is some sort of "Fountain of Youth" kinda deal, because for it to work I guess he has to stay under for the entire length of some hourglass timer.  (All I kept thinking in my head was "And like the sands through the hourglass, so go the Days Of Our Lives...") These new Others drag Sawyer and Miles to the party, so they don't feel left out. When Hurley tells the others that Jacob is dead (duh!) they freak, set off a flare (to warn Richard) and put gun powder everywhere (explaining that in a minute) I'll get to what happens to Sayid in a second.  For now let's move to another part of the island....

2007 The beach/What Lies Beneath the Statue
SOOOOO..... For those who didn't watch the recap (WHY?!) here's the basic background on Jacob/Man in Black.  They have been there for what seems like forever.  Jacob likes to bring people here and watch them "progress", but MIB thinks it's stupid because it all goes to crap eventually.  They hate each other, and MIB wants to kill Jacob, but for some reason he can't do it himself.  When "Locke" and Ben go to see Jacob in the finale, Jacob realizes it isn't Locke, but the MIB and that Ben is his loophole - Ben can kill Jacob.  And he does because he is pissed Jacob has ignored him for so long.  OK.... here is where it gets good.  UnLocke tells Ben snap out of it and to go get Richard.  Ben goes out to the beach and pretends it's all OK, but sees that Locke is really dead. (Crazy eyes!) He brings in Jacob's protectors, and UnLocke isn't having that so HE CHANGES INTO SMOKEY!  Crazy. (A shout out to Team Darlton for tackling one of the biggest mysteries in the first ep of the season.) If you remember last season, Ben went to see Smokey and his dead daughter, Alex, appeared and told him to do what Locke tells him.  MIB is a sneaky SOB!  Anyway, back under the foot we discover that apparently Smokey can't get past a line of gun powder (explains the gun powder that went around Jacob's cabin) so one of the guys makes a circle around himself.  This reminds me of Supernatural.  It also reminds me of this Spongebob episode. Smokey is smart and gets his man anyway.  And in case you missed it - the bullet that was fired at UnLocke bounced off him, Superman style.  We discover that even though this guy isn't actually Locke, he does have all his memories, leading to the saddest LOST revelation: Locke's last thought was "I don't understand."  Neither do I John, neither do I!  UnLocke leaves the foot statue and Frank sums up what everyone is thinking, "I'm seeing it, but I'm still not believing it."  Except that's probably not what Richard is thinking - he is thinking "Oh crap!" because apparently he was not buddies with the MIB like he was with Jacob, made obvious by UnLocke knocking him out.

And back at The Temple, Sayid came back to life and said, "What Happened?"   I'd like to know too, Sayid, or whoever you are....

So now the question is - how do these two realities mesh?  Are they simultaneous somehow?  Are they Fringe-style alternate realities? My guess: they are two different realities that will ultimately show us that these people are connected, plane crash or not. Fate, destiny, the island, whatever you want to call it, is not going to be deterred by an H-bomb going off!  (Go watch the movie Sliding Doors.  See how that ends, and you will get what I mean) Who are Jacob and MIB?  God/Devil seems to be popular theory - but can you KILL God?  And where is this home that MIB is so eager to get to?  The island is not his home?  Kevin suggested they may be some sort of fallen angels (wasn't the Devil one, anyway?) and are punished to stay on this island.  Team Darlton does love biblical references - have you seen the promo photofor Season 6?

And what does all of this mean?  I have no frakking idea, but I'm definitely interested to find out!  What I do know - Jack was apparently right (or at least kinda right) when he told still paralyzed John, "Nothings irreversible."

Alright my people, comment away.... I'm taking questions and ideas, because your guess is as good as mine! 

BTW- in case you missed it, Team Darlton announced that the finale is Sunday, May 23.  Because sometimes Stephen McPherson isn't a complete idiot, and knew better than to schedule the finale opposite the final performance show for American Idol! Good job Stephen!